"S" Words

My #1 son said after school one day:

"Mom. You would not believe what one of the kids in my class said today!" Son #1 said to me as he swung his checkered back pack over his shoulder, eyebrows raised in two lower case 'n' shapes. 


"The 'S' word..."

"Which one?"

Please note.. the 'S' words in our house are not the standard version.  They include S*utup and S*upid.  These are our 'S' words. 

My son diliberated on how best to describe and dictate this particular 'S' word without actually saying it and his wheels began to turn in rapid succession.  Thinking, imagining, gesturing..

He stated the word, "Shut" then pointed directly with one finger toward the sky. 

"Ohhh." I say.  "That word.  Wow, who'd the kid say that to and what happened?"

He began to tell me with much detail the when and why this word was announced by his 9 year old classmate and in what context.  This subject may not register as jaw dropping conversation for most parents but I can guarantee you one thing, on some of the city streets I have worked as a cop, these two words render significant impact. 
Troubling as it may seem, the average person would be shocked how much this dialouge from parent to parent or parent to child alter a child's perception of the world and how they fit in it.  A child who hears these two words in my line of work are usually hearing them in a descriptive fashion to supply much needed emphasis to something they are or are doing.  This type of descriptive slap in the face is very hard to witness when standing in the middle of someone's living room, unannounced in most cases and carrying the confinement possibilities of criminal code in your pocket.

I do not have a problem now nor ever speaking up during public exchanges while on duty and these words are spoken quite often in my line of work.  I figure the least I can do is to object in the presence of others that while I am overseeing these activities on this call, those words will not be used to describe anyone.

Even in my most frustrating moments as a police officer, including one where a person in the back of my car screamed the 'C' word in my right ear about 1,239 times while I filled out paperwork, the most heard from me was "Would you BE QUIET!!!" (very loudly, I must add).  After about 2 of those attempts which were actually futile, I just laughed.

I will never call nor state the 'S' words to my children.  The lack of respect, degrading connotation and disregard for a person associated with those words are just.... well... they're just....... stu.... DUMB!

Now, I will be quiet........


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I figured things out late in life, like what I wanted to do, getting married (age 30), having kids, (36 and 38) and changing degrees about 3 times. Now as a cop of 19 years and in my mid 40's, I am finally figuring out some things. My first career or dream of becoming a writer is playing more in my head and daily life than ever. I love it. Thus the blog. It is all mine. I also love being a mother. They are all ours. I love my husband and as a cop, wow.. have I seen some things. Street degree. I got it. Let us learn together. I also am on She Writes.